11 Sep
We’ve been in this house for going on two months now. Some days we move about the house with such second-natured swiftness that it feels as though we’ve been here forever. Other days the two large and completely empty rooms look as lonely as the picture hooks and nails jutting from the blank walls.
In the past two months we’ve settled in to our daily routine well, being unpacked and settled enough for all the essentials – sleep, bathe, eat, cook, play.
And though we have empty and cavernous rooms and unadorned walls – we have hardly stopped since we moved in. Most nights of the week, once we get the kids to bed and while I am getting the basic daily chores done, Cory is usually puttering away at one task or another to make the house more comfortable for us. Getting our tv & internet was a first priority, of course, but he’s put up shelves, changed locks, rearranged lightswitch wiring, installed (our first ever!) garage door opener – and lots of other little things. I’ve unpacked a my share of boxes too, but not as many as Cory.
We’ve also spent a fair bit of money – which takes a lot of work and time. We nearly tripled our living space and so we have rooms to fill. Though we aren’t interested in cluttering our newfound space up with ‘things’ just because, we *are* interested in having a comfortable and lived in house. And this requires more furniture than we previously owned.
This blog entry has taken a turn from what I set out wanting to write, and I can’t blame anyone but myself for getting off track – haha! I intended to write an entry talking about the balance between enjoying time off work and doing responsible adult things.
Now that I’ve re-read the first couple of paragraphs of this entry I think what I was trying to get at is (bullet points might keep me on track!):
- we want to settle in to this house, to make it a home we are comfortable in
- to do that we need to do some work
- to do that it takes time
- we both work full time, so that leaves evenings and weekends
- we want to spend time with our kids and each other on the weekends
- we want to take the kids outside the house, doing activities and experiencing things (ie: playground, swimming, library, farmers market, visiting friends, special events, etc – but not all in one weekend of course!)
- we want to spend time at home with the kids, doing nothing (playing, arts & crafts, movies, etc)
- to be most comfortable in our home ‘doing nothing’ we need to do more work and take more time to do that work
- and so on, and so on….
So, where’s the balance?
This is not a new struggle to us just because we are in this new-to-us house, but it does exacerbate it.
Anyone out there reading this with small kids (knock knock knock.. [hollow echos] ….. anyone?) or who at one point had small kids:
How do you balance family time with adult responsibility time?
I’d love to hear.
109 Responses for "Balance"
This question just totally stressed me out! Mostly because when I thought about it for a minute I realized that I don’t strike any kind of balance and adult responsibility almost always wins. There is no balance. You can focus on spending quality time with kids one week and struggle to catch up on adult crap the next week or the other way around. Ewwww that sounds gross wha?
Well there’s only one child and there’s only one me…so while many times I only have myself to rely upon, I also only have to worry about one other person…I think it must be much harder for your family to find balance than mine cause you get pulled in so many directions. If I was you I would consider this an exceptional time, considering the sheer volume of work that comes with a new home……and realize that most times you’re doing a great job of balancing work vs play, and jobs vs fun, because you kids are friggin sweet, social and friendly little folks, and you and cory obviously still have respect and love for each other.
Plus……balance is a myth. It’s the impression of balance that matters, and to have that all you need to feel is that you did your best to do the right thing on any given day.
Hang on I’m stepping off the soapbox there now
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